The Hot and Cold Game: Our Personal Guidance System

Anita and I have seven children. When our children were young, we loved to play the hot and cold game.

To play, we would have one child leave the room while another family member hid a small object somewhere in the room. The object had to be hidden in plain sight. When the child came back, the rest of us would clap our hands louder and louder whenever they moved closer to the hidden object, letting them know they were getting “hotter” and “hotter.” We would clap our hands softer and softer whenever they were moving away from the object, letting them know they were getting “colder” and “colder.” When they were standing right next to the hiding place, we would clap as loudly as we could, and when they found the object we would applaud and cheer! Then it was that child's turn to hide the object while another member of the family left the room.

This was a great game for our family because every one of our children, no matter how old or young, could play and win the game. After playing a time or two, they understood how the game worked. Then all they had to do was to notice how loud our clapping was and move in the direction that made the clapping louder. Because the object was hidden in plain sight, they would eventually find it. The system worked every time for everyone.

When our children got older, we would choose hiding places that weren't quite as obvious—maybe higher, or in a nook, or around a corner—but still in plain sight. Our children could still find the object by simply remembering how the system worked and staying engaged until they found it. The system for the game was designed to guarantee that each of us could always know which direction to go and where to look for what we were trying to find.

Wouldn't life be great if each of us had a personal guidance system like that one—one that is easy to learn to use and that we can consistently rely on to work for us without fail?

After many years of playing the real game of life, I can confidently say that we do! However, in certain respects our real guidance system works opposite of the way the hot and cold game works—which might explain why everyone gets a little confused sometimes about how it works.

When my family played the hot and cold game, we used a physical guidance system. We were guided and directed by changing volume levels of noise, which we detected by using our physical ears as our primary navigation instruments.

Similarly, each of us has a personal guidance system that is spiritual in nature. Our souls are guided and directed constantly by the Spirit of the Lord, by the voice of His Spirit. Our spiritual guidance system has two primary navigation instruments, which we commonly call our mind and our heart.

The Lord was referring to this spiritual guidance system when he revealed to Oliver Cowdery, “[B]ehold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart. Now, behold, this is the spirit of revelation; behold, this is the spirit by which Moses brought the children of Israel through the Red Sea on dry ground” (D&C 8:2-3 (emphasis added)).

To be led by the Lord’s Spirit, we must yield our hearts to God, and we must be willing to follow the guidance and direction He gives us, for, as Doctrine and Covenants 64:34 teaches, “the Lord requireth the heart and a willing mind” (emphasis added).

When my family played the hot and cold game, we knew where to go as the noise got louder and louder. But ordinarily our spiritual guidance system doesn’t work that way. Our spiritual guidance system works best as our raucous thoughts and emotions quiet down and our hearts and minds are open.

Russell M. Nelson, President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, recently said: 

“We live in a time prophesied long ago, when ‘all things shall be in commotion; and surely, men’s hearts shall fail them; for fear shall come upon all people’ (Doctrine and Covenants 88:91). That was true before the pandemic, and it will be true after. Commotion in the world will continue to increase. In contrast, the voice of the Lord is not ‘voice of a great tumultuous noise, but … it [is] a still voice of perfect mildness, [like] a whisper, and it [pierces] even to the very soul’ (Helaman 5:30). In order to hear this still voice, you too must be still! (See Psalm 46:10.) 

“For a time, the pandemic has canceled activities that would normally fill our lives. Soon we may be able to choose to fill that time again with the noise and commotion of the world. Or we can use our time to hear the voice of the Lord whispering His guidance, comfort, and peace. Quiet time is sacred time—time that will facilitate personal revelation and instill peace.”

(“What We Are Learning and Will Never Forget,” Russell M. Nelson, October 2020 General Conference.)

The voice of God is “still” because it is void of commotion, confusion or contention. Although it is small and quiet, the voice of God is clear and can be easily discerned and understood, when we ourselves are still and sincere. When we hear the voice of God in our minds and feel it resonate in our hearts, we know exactly what to do and where to go. We just know.

I believe that the still small voice of God is always available to guide us. Sometimes we don’t know where to look for it. Other times we don’t recognize it or pay attention to it. Sometimes we are just distracted by the noisiness of life. And sometimes we feel overcome by life’s clamor and commotion.

What if it seems like our noisy thoughts won’t quiet down on their own? What can we do then?

I love Doctrine and Covenants 6:36, which reads: “Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.”

In every thought.

The next verse says, “Behold the wounds which pierced my side, and also the prints of the nails in my hands and feet; be faithful, keep my commandments, and ye shall inherit the kingdom of heaven. Amen” (Doctrine and Covenants 6:37).

When we look unto Christ in every thought, including the noisy doubtful and fearful ones, we remember His loving, redeeming sacrifice for us, which can help us quiet our doubts and fears.

Elder David A. Bednar spoke about this in his April 2015 General Conference talk titled, “Therefore They Hushed Their Fears.” He said:

“In the land of Helam, Alma’s people were frightened by an advancing Lamanite army.

“‘But Alma went forth and stood among them, and exhorted them that they should not be frightened, but … should remember the Lord their God and he would deliver them.

“‘Therefore they hushed their fears’ (Mosiah 23:27-28).

“Notice Alma did not hush the people’s fears. Rather, Alma counseled the believers to remember the Lord and the deliverance only He could bestow (see 2 Nephi 2:8). And knowledge of the Savior’s protecting watchcare enabled the people to hush their own fears.”

Few things help me to calm my mind and heart and to prepare to receive wisdom like the words, “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).

I know from personal experience that our spiritual guidance system—like the hot and cold game my family used to play—is designed to guarantee that each of us can find our way through life.

We can receive that personalized spiritual direction by simply remembering how the system works, including where to look, and staying engaged until we find our way—again and again and again and again.

I know of no greater blessing in this life.

Photo Credit: Pawel Czerwinski